You know what I wish sometimes? Sometimes I wish that out mouths came with word processing software. You know – like the software on your computer. There would be this little screen that popped up in your mind the minute you thought about saying something, and it would allow you to edit the words before they came out wrong. Maybe it would even have those little green sqwuiggly underlines to tell you that something needed a little attention. You could mentally right-click on the phrase highlighted and read a message that would say: “Caution: this content might be a little offensive to others present. Consider revising.”
I’d love it if it had a feature that would allow you to recall what you had just published, too. A simple “ctrl+Z” and zip! All that garbage that just flew past your lips would be instantly undone. Maybe it could even include sounds like the critical stop on your computer that beeps or dings at you when you’ve gone too far into dangerous territory. The critical stop on my computer in college was set to snarl like an angry lion…that would be entirely appropriate in this scenario, don’t you think?
In a way I guess we do have a version of this software – it’s called the Holy Spirit. I need to check out the “Holy Spirit for Dummies” from the library, though, to learn how to use it right. I have a habit of turning it off (so to speak) because I often don’t understand why it prompts me at times to speak up and at other times to keep my silly mouth shut. I’d do much better if I tried to understand it a little more, and if I’d at least try to obey it even when it doesn’t make any sense to me.
Oh, I’m just so tired of replaying stupid words over and over in my head. Hurtful things I’ve said to friends…ill-timed comments that have stopped the laughter of entire groups of people…silly, unnecessary exaggerations of the truth… How the list goes on. How many times have people left a room I was in and said to each other, “Can you believe she said that?” How many times have they stared at each other in the awkward, silent wake of my big mouth and lipped the word “Wow” to their friend in wide-eyed bewonderment? Surely more than once. And surely more recently than I’d like to imagine.
Renee Swope wrote on her blog several days ago about the danger of asking the question “What’s wrong with me?” She reminded us that the voice asking that question is never a friendly one – as it is always the voice of our enemy trying to knock us down. I’ve clung to that thought this weekend as I’ve gotten caught up (once again) in the tiring cycle of beating myself up over misspoken words that were either embarrassing or simply wrong to say. Oh how the enemy is trying to use those things to encourage my retreat from fellowship! Oh how he would love nothing more than for me to be afraid to ever speak openly again, whether in sharing my heart, in joking with friends or – especially – in sharing the Word of Christ! But I can’t let him win!
I don’t know if I’m the only one out there who struggles with beating herself up over things that have long since been said or done, but I’m guessing that I’m not. My guess is that a lot of women struggle with the same thing. Why? Because I don’t think the enemy is going to just lay down and forget about using such a powerful and effective weapon any and every chance he gets. Think about it: the invention of the tank was no doubt a huge step in military advancement. But do you think the first time it was seen in action the powers that be said, “Wow! That’s amazing and effective! How wonderful…let’s only use it as a last resort, though – we wouldn’t want to be too powerful.” No way! Tanks are still used on battlefields to this day because they get the job done.
In our day-to-day spiritual war, we are constantly threatened by similarly powerful weapons of guilt and shame, heavily armed and aimed straight at our hearts. You know what, though? We don’t have to take that kind of heavy fire. Sometimes it might feel like we do, because sometimes we feel like we deserve it. Other times we’re so sure that we deserve it, we think it must be friendly fire aiming to straighten us up. But be assured, guilt and shame are never from the Lord. Oh, He may discipline us or lay things on our hearts that need to be reconciled, but He will never beat us up like the enemy tries to. He will never turn on us as quickly as we turn on ourselves when we’re listening to the lies of the other side instead of His merciful voice.
One day there might indeed be a technology capable of implanting thought-editing software into our brains (that’s a scary thought…). I think I’ll take my chances with the Holy Spirit, though. It’s obvious that I need to tune into His voice a little better and listen a lot more before I speak, but I’m taking comfort in knowing that I’m a work in progress. The Lord isn’t done with me yet, and I won’t be perfected until the day He takes me home. I’m bound to mess up. Even if I took a vow of silence and said only three more words my entire life, chances are at least one of them would be wrong – that’s just the way it seems to go with me. But that’s ok. God loves me and my big mouth. I’m sure He’d like to place His hand over it every now and then, but He loves it just the same.
I’m thankful today for His grace and mercy. I’m thankful that the one beating me up isn’t the one who has power over my life. I’m thankful that there isn’t guilt or shame in Christ. And I’m thankful that there’s still a chance that not everyone heard all the stupid things I’ve said lately.
Oh Merciful Savior, rescue me from myself and teach me to hold my tongue. As a matter of fact – could you consider holding it for me? The thought of a spiritual muzzle is kind of comforting…
I’d love it if it had a feature that would allow you to recall what you had just published, too. A simple “ctrl+Z” and zip! All that garbage that just flew past your lips would be instantly undone. Maybe it could even include sounds like the critical stop on your computer that beeps or dings at you when you’ve gone too far into dangerous territory. The critical stop on my computer in college was set to snarl like an angry lion…that would be entirely appropriate in this scenario, don’t you think?
In a way I guess we do have a version of this software – it’s called the Holy Spirit. I need to check out the “Holy Spirit for Dummies” from the library, though, to learn how to use it right. I have a habit of turning it off (so to speak) because I often don’t understand why it prompts me at times to speak up and at other times to keep my silly mouth shut. I’d do much better if I tried to understand it a little more, and if I’d at least try to obey it even when it doesn’t make any sense to me.
Oh, I’m just so tired of replaying stupid words over and over in my head. Hurtful things I’ve said to friends…ill-timed comments that have stopped the laughter of entire groups of people…silly, unnecessary exaggerations of the truth… How the list goes on. How many times have people left a room I was in and said to each other, “Can you believe she said that?” How many times have they stared at each other in the awkward, silent wake of my big mouth and lipped the word “Wow” to their friend in wide-eyed bewonderment? Surely more than once. And surely more recently than I’d like to imagine.
Renee Swope wrote on her blog several days ago about the danger of asking the question “What’s wrong with me?” She reminded us that the voice asking that question is never a friendly one – as it is always the voice of our enemy trying to knock us down. I’ve clung to that thought this weekend as I’ve gotten caught up (once again) in the tiring cycle of beating myself up over misspoken words that were either embarrassing or simply wrong to say. Oh how the enemy is trying to use those things to encourage my retreat from fellowship! Oh how he would love nothing more than for me to be afraid to ever speak openly again, whether in sharing my heart, in joking with friends or – especially – in sharing the Word of Christ! But I can’t let him win!
I don’t know if I’m the only one out there who struggles with beating herself up over things that have long since been said or done, but I’m guessing that I’m not. My guess is that a lot of women struggle with the same thing. Why? Because I don’t think the enemy is going to just lay down and forget about using such a powerful and effective weapon any and every chance he gets. Think about it: the invention of the tank was no doubt a huge step in military advancement. But do you think the first time it was seen in action the powers that be said, “Wow! That’s amazing and effective! How wonderful…let’s only use it as a last resort, though – we wouldn’t want to be too powerful.” No way! Tanks are still used on battlefields to this day because they get the job done.
In our day-to-day spiritual war, we are constantly threatened by similarly powerful weapons of guilt and shame, heavily armed and aimed straight at our hearts. You know what, though? We don’t have to take that kind of heavy fire. Sometimes it might feel like we do, because sometimes we feel like we deserve it. Other times we’re so sure that we deserve it, we think it must be friendly fire aiming to straighten us up. But be assured, guilt and shame are never from the Lord. Oh, He may discipline us or lay things on our hearts that need to be reconciled, but He will never beat us up like the enemy tries to. He will never turn on us as quickly as we turn on ourselves when we’re listening to the lies of the other side instead of His merciful voice.
One day there might indeed be a technology capable of implanting thought-editing software into our brains (that’s a scary thought…). I think I’ll take my chances with the Holy Spirit, though. It’s obvious that I need to tune into His voice a little better and listen a lot more before I speak, but I’m taking comfort in knowing that I’m a work in progress. The Lord isn’t done with me yet, and I won’t be perfected until the day He takes me home. I’m bound to mess up. Even if I took a vow of silence and said only three more words my entire life, chances are at least one of them would be wrong – that’s just the way it seems to go with me. But that’s ok. God loves me and my big mouth. I’m sure He’d like to place His hand over it every now and then, but He loves it just the same.
I’m thankful today for His grace and mercy. I’m thankful that the one beating me up isn’t the one who has power over my life. I’m thankful that there isn’t guilt or shame in Christ. And I’m thankful that there’s still a chance that not everyone heard all the stupid things I’ve said lately.
Oh Merciful Savior, rescue me from myself and teach me to hold my tongue. As a matter of fact – could you consider holding it for me? The thought of a spiritual muzzle is kind of comforting…
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